Response to the Gorgeous Weather

I find that my emotional happiness varies directly with the temperature outside.

That's probably a bad thing right? I should definitely NOT live anywhere in the north in my future life. California's probably the way to go. Texas gets a little *too* hot (and the whole southern thing ain't my thang), and Florida has too many critters and crawlies. And Arizona? Too dry, the landscape's too boring. Same goes for New Mexico. So Cali it is!

Personally, I believe this whole "being happy" vs. "being depressed" thing is all very silly. Now, some people are actually clinically depressed and actually have a medical problem (which may or may not be genetic or otherwise, something they probably can't change without a hormonal fixing), but most people who claim to be "depressed" are probably just saying that and trying to change up their lives somehow. Sure, there are serious times in life, and one should certainly recognize those times and slow the fuck down, but honestly, life isn't so bad for most people. And they just psych themselves out. They find the need to balance out their lives with something sad. Maybe they're attention whores and want the pity from people, maybe they guilty about being happy and automatically check themselves into depression. One shouldn't be ignorant of sadness (those mindless ones who live for the present and think life is one big joke come to mind), but one shouldn't bring sadness onto themselves. Life isn't so bad, life is actually pretty nice most of the time, and really really nice some of the time.

Ah, Spring time! It brings about the same emotions in me as Christmas does. That uplifting happy feeling when people around me are happy and I feel warm both inside and out.

FREAKING AMAZING

Duke: 68
Clemson: 66

Best last four seconds. Ever.

THIS is why we go to Duke. Screw the premed, screw the "discovering your academic passion", screw everything! That feeling of camaraderie, that amazing adrenaline rush, that *whoooshhh* of people leaping to their feet and screaming and cheering and yelling themselves hoarse.... That is why Duke is amazing.

Duke Basketball, you make me happy.

Things have changed. For the (better?)

Well now. Hum.

Now that I've settled (people tend to use that excuse a lot, "Well, I haven't *settled*, give me some time to *settle*), Duke is once more home.

Tina's moved out. No matter how badly I feel for her given her current situation, I still can't help but be elated about my living situation. And the best part is I'm not even lonely. People are in my room all the time. It's quite a nice arrangement, except when I feel like kicking people out and having some alone-time. But naw, I wouldn't want that. I like these people.

My classes are alright, dropped that damn 49s seminar (for which I would've had to wake up *far* too early), so now I'm taking only two math class (cue the "aww"s), a history and a philosophy. Somehow, I feel like I have less work this semester. Though that may have just resulted from my feeling more comfortable with Duke and this whole college deal, thing, arrangement...yeahhh.

Anyway, everything's great. Life is splendiferous. Duke is phantasmagorical. And Alex is...wonderful.

[no title]

It's 4 o'clock in the morning on the day of my flight. I'd have to leave at 5 anyway so there's no point in sleeping at all. I'll probably regret this decision later on today but it's too late to do anything about it now.

My mom insisted I pack a bunch of homemade sausages into a box. They are yummy but I don't think I'll be able to eat much of it. Well, then again I'll probably be holed up in my dorm a lot of the time next semester. Oh and news flash, Tina won't be coming back for spring semester. I hope she doesn't mind my making this information semi-public, but she's going to take a semester off and stay at home, find a job I think. But she'll be back for fall semester next year. I don't understand why, so don't ask me. Personally, I think her parents are crazy, even for Asians, but that's business I don't want to butt into.

Television is bad. Certain well-made shows, in particular, are bad. Specifically, engrossing shows such as '24' should not be allowed into the lives of busy college students. Even more specifically, Nina Chai should not be caught up in '24' right now because she needs to focus her attention on the upcoming semester. However, Nina cannot help her desire to know more about the scrumptious Jack Bauer and his adventurous escapades. What a dilemma. What a dilemma.

I've discovered that I am not actually coherent sometimes.

I miss you all very much and I can't wait to see everyone again.

My days of wandering are at an end

Break is almost over and I'm not sad at all. It's gone by pretty quickly, and I've had a good time with old friends. Seeing old teachers was wonderful. Got to school at 11 am and didn't leave until 5 pm. Just making rounds, going from classroom to classroom. It will be sad moving to California and not seeing them again. But then again, I don't think I could do this every winter or summer break. The novelty wears off, I suppose.

I'm starting to pack again! Packing isn't so much fun but the thought of returning to Duke keeps me going and *makes* it super-duper fun. The plane ride even seems endurable when I think of my final destination. I'm bringing a rice cooker! Huzzah for that. Rice is amazing. Marketplace rice is disgusting. They give such a skewed representation of "Asian food". Pshawwww. It's just half-cooked vegetables on top of half-cooked rice all drenched with soy sauce anyway. Not at all what Chinese food tastes like. Terrible terrible. My mom should go out there and train them for a week...*then* we might be able to get some really Chinese food.

Okay, I'm gonna go back to watching 24 now...I'm so hooked!!! Jack Bauer is my hero!

I'll think of something later...

Is anyone enjoying home as much as they should? Does anyone else get the feeling that somehow time is being wasted waking up much too late everyday, meeting friends and doing stupid yet fun things, eating mom's good cooking until I can't eat anymore...anybody feel restless? I guess that's the moment you realize that you actually went to the right school, when you'd be willing to give up winter break just to be back at the institution of learning again. I even miss the perpetually bumpy buses with the drivers who would fail any driver's license test if they took it now. And I miss Randolph, and I miss my dorm bed, which is actually more comfortable than my own bed at home. It's strange, that I'm calling this house home, when I've only been here for a few weeks versus the much longer time I spend at Duke.

On a sidenote: The Shins have a new album out, I must say 'tis rawther sublime. I love songs that build up slowly from a meager sound to full guitar, full everything. I always liked that band. Very creative, they are. The new Explosions CD is also quite fantasmagorical. 'All of a Sudden I Miss Everyone'. Precisely, is what I have to say to that.

I was suppose to do so much this break. But that really didn't end up happening. I haven't even worked my way through a single book. It's depressing.

I miss people a lot, I miss being able to go next door, or down the hall, or upstairs and see them and talk to them. I miss the style of living at Duke. The classes (maybe not so much), the whole...way of living. I love college.

Anyway, can't wait to get back to Duke. Can't wait.

Clear waters and wet breezes

Well, here I am sitting in my cabin on the last evening of my first cruise. We debark tomorrow morning at 7:30, then it's onward to Houston to do some shopping before finally heading back home. This cruise has definitely been a lot of fun, the ports were gorgeous, the weather not too hot. One quip I have about these cruises: everything is so...tourist-y. I know that we can't possibly see the real Mexico without really embedding ourselves into the more private locales, but let's face it, sailing around the ocean with two thousand other Americans probably isn't going to bring me the real Mexico. Especially since we went to Cozumel and Progresso, two areas that are heavily dependent on tourist business. Bleh.

Day 0: We begin our journey at 5 pm. We spent the evening exploring the ship and all it's fun little nooks. It's funny how they took a tiny little space and call it a "Card Room" or the "Explorer's Library". Kind of how we take a tiny little space and call it a closet.

Day 1: A "Fun" Day at Sea, or so they say. We basically spent the day cruising our way to Cozumel. Activities on board, I spent most of the day eating and reading Ender's Game, which I brought along with me. One thing that's excellent on the high seas: the food. There was a nice show at the end of the day, a bunch of dancers and singers, sort of a watered down Cirque du Soleil. Not extremely spectacular but I'll give them credit for catering to the whole family. Watched Sandlot 2, not a bad movie, brings back good memories of the first Sandlot, that adorable guy specifically.

Day 2: Docked at Cozumel, Mexico. We elected to spend three and a half hours kayaking and snorkeling. The kayaks were clear so you could see straight to the bottom of the reef. Lessons learned: seawater is disgusting, the snorkel tube is not as long as I thought. Also, kayaking in the ocean is certainly not the same as kayaking on a still lake. Them waves shore are strong. Our damn guide was also paddling so damn fast. We had an odd number of people in our group so I volunteered to go by myself in a single kayak. Yeah, my arms were so effing tired by the end of that. Then came snorkeling. All I can say is, I swallowed a shitload of seawater that day. Absolutely disgusting. First I didn't realize how short the snorkel tube was, then I accidentally breathed in while my mask was filling up with water. I finally got so fed up with the damn breathing tube that I just took it off and starting diving on held breaths. Pretty fish down there, I starting chasing some around and almost touched a purple and blue striped one. Got back on shore and did some shopping. Ate lunch in downtown Cozumel, got serenaded by three old guys with guitars and sombreros, and had the best soft taco ever.

Day 3: Docked at Progresso. Took a two and half hour bus ride to Chichen Itza, which was spectacular. The place looked very familiar due to the fact that I had watched Apacalyto. Lots of Mexican vendors around the place selling little doohickies. I got to practice my haggling skills which have been honed to almost perfection by watching my family shop in China many times. Some freak weather we had as well, one moment it's bright and sunny, next moment it's pouring rain and we had to duck under trees for cover. After a nice nap on the bus (which actually wasn't so nice due to some annoying little boy sitting in the seat behind me. I swear if he had banged on the window one more time I would've turned around, hulked out and given him a real banging. This is precisely why I hate little kids. More shopping in Progresso, got hit on by some random Mexican guy at a shop (Manuel was his name, I guess he was cute, tried to sell me a shirt with "SEXY" printed in bold letters over the chest, a little sketch if you ask me), and back to the ship. Exhausting and fun day. (Watched The Devil Wears Prada lying in bed with a glass of lemonade.)

Day 4: Another "Fun" Day at Sea. Spent the morning sleeping and eating breakfast. Played some ping pong but was driven inside by a random rain storm. Saw some dolphins swimming near our ship and another cruise ship passing by far away. Went to a Christmas show, ate dinner, watched Flightplan, went to another show (hilarious comedian by the name of Percy Crews. This was the family friendly version so I would imagine that he'd be much funnier), and now I'm going to eat again at the midnight buffet in a few minutes.

No communication, no cell phones, no Internet. I still brought my laptop and my iPod, though I guess I would've been okay without them. Really, I was content to sit out on the deck and watch the ocean. The weather was at a perfect temperature so I didn't have to worry about getting burnt, which I'm prone to doing. I can't decide which I like better, staring out at the blue sea in daylight or staring out into the darkness and seeing only stars in the top half of my field of vision. Both are nice. If only the breeze weren't so wet. I'll post pictures on Facebook. It just occurred to me how fun cruises would be with friends. You can't cruise without an adult until you're 21 in any case. But ugh, we should seriously consider it. And plus, many many many hot foreign guys working on board with hot foreign accents. Carnival hires from all over the world (I assume labor is cheaper overseas) and oh boy am I glad they did. For example, the guy who serves our bread and butter every evening at dinner is from Bosnia. So cute with the most adorable accent. Ack....

And now I actually get to go back home and see my friends. I'll get to eat some real food (the food on the ship was great, but too similar to Marketplace food). But I already miss Duke terribly. Is anyone else looking forward to going back to school already? Besides seeing my friends and shopping, I'll have about two and a half weeks at home. I'll be sitting around, probably sleeping past 11 everyday. And eating. And fixing my computer. Yeah I guess I'll be occupied. And I'll definitely like the no work aspect.

Well, it's midnight buffet time. I need to go stuff myself again. I don't think I'll eat for a week when I get back home.

See you all on January 9th!

Sunny Austin, TX

Finally home after a whole semester! After not seeing my parents for ages, it was so good see them waiting for me at the bottom of the escalator, so good to hug my mom and dad. I think I've grown a little bit since I feel taller compared to my dad, or else he's shrunk. My house hasn't changed much, except for the massive flat screen TV that replaced the long overdue old TV we had. My mom's been cooking, you have no idea how good it smelt when I opened door from the garage. And my mom's a good cook. I don't think I've stopped eating since stepping foot inside my house. My parents just keep shoving food in front of my face, and it's so good that I just have to eat it. I swear I'm going to gain more weight in a three and half week span than a whole semester of Marketplace food.

Leaving tomorrow at 7 am for a cruise, that should be fun, lots of pictures are imminent. I think one of the stops is at some Mayan ruins, which should be fun after having watched Apocalypto (which I encourage everyone to see. It is a fantastic film. I wouldn't see it again just because I couldn't take the blood and guts all over again, but the savage beauty does hit the spot the first time around).

I'll update sporadically during break, now that I have more time to organize some thoughts. Right now though, this time difference thing is cutting into my beauty sleep.

Ruminations upon what's gone down

The semester is actually (non-officially) over. No more classes. I won't see some of my teachers again (it's still weird to consider them 'professors', such a stuffy and overly pedantic word isn't it?). How does it feel? Actually, it doesn't really feel like much of anything at the moment. Probably because I'm scared shitless about this math final. But I'm not going to whine and complain about that for now. Maybe Thursday afternoon I'll just skidaddle over to the nearest bridge and trip over the edge. I must admit, that seriously sounds like an attractive option versus sitting down and taking a 3-hour math test.

Good things and bad things about the end of the semester: No more annoying assignments, no more working for a full 3.5 weeks. Real food at home! Seeing my parents, which will be great. Not knowing what to get people for Christmas, but still really excited for holiday shopping. Heck, going *shopping* again when I get home...not that I'm girlish or anything. Not seeing friends here but seeing friends back home. Swapping wild college stories with friends back home. Sleeping in my own bed. Playing on my grand piano. Missing Duke. Going home. What a dichotomous situation.

I should get on textbooks for next year soon. I think I have like 15 for just one class. Probably not, divide everything I say by 5. Haha, that's from Monty Python. So funny...(Alex: I don't know about this ellipsis thing, but I think three (...)s are fine if it's the end of a paragraph. Maybe? Nit picky grammar is my favorite.

First semester assessment: Worth every minute. No regrets.

As we move closer to the finish line...

How did everyone do this semester? Maybe you didn't do so hot in your classes, maybe you completely showed up the rest of your class, maybe you're feeling that you've been raped up the ass by math tests (*raises hand*)...but the semester is OVER. The concept of time is quite scary, actually. I'll never see 2:22 pm December 3rd, 2006 ever again. Somehow, I think we all have such large ambitions that never quite get accomplished. I always read stories about how people do amazing things in college (saving children in Africa, assisting in cutting edge cancer research, blah blah blah...) and I think to myself, "Hmm, I am actually quite useless."

But I am sad that first semester whizzed by so quickly. I am equally excited to go back home (where I haven't been since coming to Duke, mind you), and seeing all my friends, seeing how much everyone has changed. And another thing, I know I'll miss Duke like crazy. I need to find a way to occupy myself this summer so that will whiz by quickly and I won't be realizing what time I've wasted. I mean...spent on...very important things.

It's amazing how close one can get to people who live in close proximity to one. I recall saying this around the first month of school, but I feel like I've known these people for ages, not just barely half a year. I find myself forgoing sleep very often in order to spend time with friends. This is something I'd never do in high school. High school somehow seemed so much more difficult. Maybe it has something to do with all the pseudo-extra time we now have. College is so much more efficient. That's one thing about high school that I so resented, the utter waste of time. You're stuck in one damn building for 6 or 7 hours and how much of that time actually goes towards learning? Probably less than 1/4. Probably.

Now I should go work on philosophy.

Let's start something

Not that I particularly enjoy writing, but sometimes it's good to get some words flowing out of you rather than numbers if you know what I mean. I think it'd be a good outlet. Blogging always helps me organize my thoughts, whenever I chance to have a thought. Most of you may already have a blog, but hey, life has changed so much since last summer (I know mine has), and I haven't really had the chance to ponder, muse, brood, contemplate, deliberate...(I'm running out of synonyms).

It's so convenient to create a page on Blogger, post when you feel like it. Maybe it's 3 am and you're tired of writing that paper, so post a little something and clear thoughts out of your mind. My high school friends and I did something similar, it actually turned out to be quite a nice little community. Much more private than something like Facebook or Livejournal (or sundry other sites. I think we used Opera, which was nice).

I don't mean to go emo on anyone or starting waxing philosophical here, but it's nice to just write something. Besides, you can practice those amazing writing skills you've acquired (or will acquire) from Writing 20.

Well? Anyone?